Uhuuuh, I am in requesting mood, sorry!!! Kimi deflowering Seb. Kimi is all experienced and Seb is all shy, clumsy and awkward But Kimi finds it endearing and lets Seb have his way until he simply can't take it anymore and shows Seb how to do things right.
It’s not something they’ve really talked about in detail, the whole taking-your-virginity thing, but here the both of them are on a Friday night on the bed, kissing each other like they can’t stop. Kimi is mouthing at Sebastian’s neck, trying to take off his shirt at the same time, and Sebastian is running his hands hungrily over Kimi’s body, stroking whatever smooth skin he can find.
Kimi finally manages to get his shirt off, throwing it aside, and then presses Sebastian against the mattress, sucking bruises into his skin.
“Is this it?” Sebastian asks suddenly, watching Kimi’s hands slide underneath Sebastian’s shirt. “Are we going to do it today?”
“Do you want me to stop?” Kimi asks, and Sebastian shakes his head quickly
“No. I don’t want you to stop.”
Kimi pulls Sebastian’s shirt over his head, and Sebastian looks up at him nervously, curls askew.
“I don’t know what to do.” He admits and Kimi kisses his nose
“I know you do.” Sebastian blushes. “It’s me whose the virgin over here.”
Kimi presses another kiss to Sebastian’s skin. “It’s cute.”
“You won’t think of me differently after we have sex, will you?” Sebastian asks, watching Kimi kiss his way downwards.
“Of course not. You’re not going to be any different Seb, you don’t need to lose your virginity to be a different person.” Kimi looks up at him. “I’d still love you if we never had sex, or if you’d slept with hundreds of other people.”
Sebastian smiles. “Thank you.”
“I want you to be happy.” Kimi says awkwardly, “I don’t want you to have a bad experience.”
Sebastian takes a deep breath. “I’m okay.”
Sebastian nods and Kimi wriggles a little down Sebastian’s body until he’s facing Sebastian’s chest, and then leans forward and sucks on Sebastian’s left nipple, running his tongue over the little nub. Sebastian gasps, and the sound is good to Kimi’s ear before he moves his mouth to the other one, kissing and sucking until Sebastian is a sensitive mess underneath him.
“Kimi,” Sebastian moans out, “Kimi, I can’t.”
Kimi very gently nibbles a little and Sebastian buries his fingers in Kimi’s hair, making a mewling noise that Kimi can’t deny is turning him on a lot. He presses one final kiss to Sebastian’s nipple before starting to undo Sebastian’s belt.
“I’m not going to last.” Sebastian says hurriedly, “I don’t- you’re- it hurts.”
“Hurts?” Kimi asks, concerned, hands pausing
“In a good way.” Sebastian says quickly. “It just- I feel close.”
Kimi thinks for a moment. “I’m not having you come straight away.”
“I don’t want to either.” Sebastian tilts his head to one side. “Should I suck you off?”
Kimi looks at him. “Are you sure?”
Sebastian nods, a little embarrassed. “I like sucking you off.”
There was one time during a practice session in Spa when it was raining heavily (can't remember whether it's 2012 or 2013) where Seb and Heikki were photographed sharing an umbrella with Heikki handing the umbrella over to Seb as he was carrying a bag. Can we have some jealous Kimi because he saw it with his own eyes? Maybe they haven't gotten into a r'ship but Kimi just couldn't stop himself from getting too jealous about it and confronts Seb?
(Anonymous asked you:Kimi gets jealous over Jenson after seeing him hanging out with Seb a lot over the weekend.)
“Are you fucking Heikki?”
Sebastian stops laughing from where he’s chatting happily with Jensen to stare at Kimi. “What?”
Kimi repeats the question, crossing his arms expectantly. “So are you?”
“No!” Sebastian replies, “Why would I be?”
“You’re always with him.”
“I’m always with Jensen as well.” Sebastian says, motioning towards him.
“I’m not going to respond to that.” Kimi says, and Sebastian and Jensen’s eyes go wide
“I have a girlfriend-”
Kimi shrugs. “I don’t know Sebastian.”
“So what if I was anyway?” Sebastian asks, “It’s not like we’re in a relationship.”
“I know.” Kimi says and Sebastian studies him
“Do you want to be?”
“Do you want to be in a relationship?” Sebastian asks. “We’re already sleeping together.”
“I didn’t need to know that!” Jensen interrupts and Kimi nods
So, James had a job as an ice cream man when he was younger IRL and so I took that and made up some crap. It’s completely AU because Kimi and Seb are teenagers and James and Niki are late 20’s. I don’t even know, so much crack and fluff. Also, big big thanks to nadayoghurt who gave it a read when I really wasn’t sure what to make of it and convinced me to post it!
Title: Ice Cream Headache Pairing: James Hunt/Niki Lauda & Kimi Räikkönen/Sebastian Vettel Rating: PG Word Count: 4,637
“I feel sick.”
James sighed, not bothering to turn back around to look at the young Finn who was sprawled on his back along the truck floor, chewing on a Magnum stick. “Hardly surprising. How many ice creams is that now?”
Kimi grumbled. “Maybe if you were selling more, we wouldn’t have so many left over.”
“Well, maybe if you helped me…this is work experience, isn’t it?”
Another grumble. He wrangled himself into a sitting position, all awkward limbs after his latest growth spurt. He’d been forced to get some “cash handling” experience in the summer, in order to get an actual job and he wasn’t really keen on the idea. To be honest, no-one was really keen on taking him on either, he wasn’t exactly a ray of sunshine. His parents had told him to try something he had an interest in but the only things that sprung to mind were cars and ice cream.
… so I heard that you would like nice things sent to you? ;) And work was boring, so I wrote you crack for that wonderful drawing of Aaaaaall The Retro Drivers you made! :D [look at me calling my own fic a nice thing 8D] Here, hope you enjoy it! :))
[NB: Timelines? Dead drivers? NEVER HEARD OF THEM WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?]
PEOPLE LOOK WHAT AMAZING PERFECT AND PRECIOUS THING nadayoghurt WROTE FOR ME OH MY GOD
So it’s 3AM and It’s just occurred to me that the most telling scene in the entire Harry Potter franchise is the scene following the announcement of the participants of the Triwizard tournament.
When Harry’s name is pulled out of the cup, literally one of the first things he is asked is “did you ask an older boy to put your name in the cup for you?" or something to that effect, insinuating that, that was something nobody prepared for and that it was something that totally would have worked if anyone had been smart enough to figure it out.
However, in an earlier scene a student is turned into a hundred year old man when they try to artificially age themselves with a potion and put their name into the cup. Meaning someone trying to dangerously age themselves with potion they aren’t familiar with was something the teachers genuinely considered to be more likely than someone asking for fucking help from another student.
In other words, the wizards in Harry Potter’s world are so reliant on magic that it doesn’t occur to anyone save for people like Harry that asking for help is even an option in a given situation. This explains why wizards are so fucking ass-backwards at everything, they’re so confident that their magic is capable of doing everything for them that it has never occurred to fucking anyone that perhaps asking for help from the muggle world might be of some use.
Think about it, the wizarding world hasn’t changed in hundreds of years while in that same space of time the muggle world has figured out fucking space travel. I know it’s a cliché to say to say someone could have fucking shot Voldemort, but seriously, somebody totally fucking could have, he killed like 50 people, he was effectively a terrorist, if anyone in the wizarding world bothered to ask for help from the muggles instead of just telling them there was an invisible asshole flying around shooting death curses at everyone, they may have been able to help.
Pretty much the only reason Voldermort thinks he’s better than muggles is because he’s able to kill them with impunity using magic, something he’s only able to do so easily because muggles don’t understand what magic is. Voldemort is basically like a fucking disease, he’s an invisible, lurking entity preying on mankind from the shadows like a cowardly piece of shit. You know what else did that? Smallpox and we stomped that to death the second we understood it. That’s the difference between muggles and wizards, when muggles don’t understand something, they figure it out.
And here’s the kicker, the only reason muggles don’t understand magic at all is because the wizarding world deliberately withholds information about it. However, even if the wizarding world kept doing that, it’d only be a matter of time until a muggle figured out what magic was and how to stop or harness it because that’s what humanity does, it pushes past what we think is impossible to see what’s on the other side. We didn’t understand the sun as a species originally and now we use it to power satellites and smartphones.
The wizarding world isn’t a realm of infinite possibilities, it’s a universe of strict limitations where boundaries are never questioned. The muggle world is where the real magic happens. That’s why during the course of the Harry Potter books, which are set between 1991 and 1998, the muggle world (our world) discovered dark matter, cloned a sheep and invented fucking MP3s while the wizarding world were literally paying some dipshit to figure out what the purpose of a rubber duck was.
Wow, I really shouldn’t think about this stuff when it’s like 3AM, it gets kind of dark.
For silverlynxcat, who prompted me with “heavier F1 drivers needing to lose weight to compensate for heavier engines, Niki must lose weight quickly, the only way he figures he can is to stop eating. James finds out.” half an age ago.
I’m so very sorry this took so long, I basically wrote myself into a corner and it took me while to find my way out XD [Special thanks to Flirt whose suggestions helped a lot with that, btw :))]
When he finally realises what’s going on, he feels like the worst of idiots for not working it out sooner.
The first clue comes right after the first testing session of the season, really.
McLaren and Brabham happen to be testing at Paul Ricard on the same day, and James is waiting for Niki when the Autrian hops out of his brand new car. He’s just scored a rather fantastic lap time for a very first outing and the Brit expects him to be pleased about it, but instead, it’s a frown that’s revealed when Niki pulls his helmet off.
“What’s the matter Ratty?” he calls, a smile in his voice. “Car not living up to your Ferrari standards? Are you gonna have to actually try this year?”
Niki drops his helmet and gloves on the rear wind of the car, and then turns around to flip him off with a grin. The frown has fallen off his face at James’ words, replaced by a mischievous expression.
“You wish, my dear. Get used to that rear wing, you will see it a lot this year!”
They bicker all the way through their lunch break, as per usual, and if Niki eats noticeably less than usual, James simply puts it down to the fact that the man isn’t the biggest fan of French food.
He does ask what Niki was so cross about, a few hours later, and the Austrian simply shrugs it off, explaining that the Brabham is quite a lot heavier than the Ferrari he used to drive. James, idiot that he is, takes it to mean that the car doesn’t quite handle the way Niki would like it to as a result, and he doesn’t question it further.
When he sees Niki again at another testing session before the seasons truly kicks off, the Austrian is wearing new overalls.
James doesn’t really pay it any mind; the man has just switched teams, and changing overalls is current practice in those cases. Actually, he’s more surprised than anything that he decided to keep them Ferrari red.
He does pick up on one little difference though.
“You know Ratty, that Parmalat waistband is doing wonders for your complexion… I should recommend that to my girlfriends actually, instead of always being on a diet. Who knew, white band around your waist, so slimming!”
The Austrian does glare at him and flip him off for that one, but then again, that’s been Niki’s standard reaction to James’ teasing since they met a good ten years ago.
The voice of Niki is clipped, harsh, thickened by his accent and cutting as he directs his words at James, the other man, the other driver, who stands swaying against the wall of their garage, eyes glazing over the blurred form of Niki’s Brabham, shiny, new, polished, waxed, oiled, a new car, a new drive, a new sponsor, a new team, new.
"It’s a car, a Formula 1 car, a Brabham, what the hell do you want me to say?"
The words are slurred, spilling from the Brit’s mouth in a wavy line, as he shrugs, his silk robe falling around the back of his calves, raising his glass to his lips, seeing the shine of his silver band in the light.
"The engine’s a catastrophe, the Fan Car’s ridiculous, the back weight is illegal, the width is stupidly wide for regulations-" Niki’s words are fast and stunted, jabbing the air as the Austrian moves around the vehicle, one arm crossed, the other gesturing at model.
"Niki, I don’t care, I don’t care about the car." James yells back, slouching forward, his voice more of a whine, a protest, swallowing a mouthful of bourbon whiskey that burns his throat, pouring himself another with clinking glasses.
"It’s a new team, a new season-"
"I’m retired, Niki, I’m fucking retired, just leave it alone-"
"Are you jealous of me? Jealous of the new car?" Niki is demanding, jabbing at his own thin chest, as James furrows his brows, looking away from the brightness of the car, squinting, the walls swimming before him, Niki’s words bouncing off his ears, as the smaller man stares unblinkingly at his husband, swaying, sinking along the wall down to the floor of their tiled garage; James is his other, his person, who else would he want to talk to about his new drive?
"The car’s a mess, I’m not jealous." James slurs, and Niki nods, sucking in his teeth.
"So you admit it’s a wreck. A disaster."
"The whole team’s a fucking disaster."
"A team that can pay me a million dollar salary." Niki points out.
The tall blonde scoffs, reaching over to pour the brown liquor down his flaming throat. “You’re in it for the money.” He slurs, his voice deep and thick, pooling together.
"Of course." Niki says, as though this is obvious. "If I had more talent, and could make more money doing something else, I would."
"You’re a fucking sellout!" James snaps, as Niki’s eyes harden, and the Brit clammers to his feet, swaying, jabbing his finger in the air towards the driver. "You’re not passionate, you don’t care, you bring in money, and percentages, and you become a pro. You killed the sport, Niki! You’re a sellout!"
"We are pros!" Niki snaps back, his smaller frame stiff, his eyes locked on the blonde as he rolls his eyes, glancing away. "Professional race car drivers-"
"You are." James slurs thickly. "Not me."
"Your choice." Niki responds, and James blinks, hard, as though struggling to remember something he forgot.
"I loved the sport." James mumbles heavily, his voice blurring together. "People like you kill it."
"Fuck off." Niki spits, and James laughs sarcastically, moving his glazed-over-eyes to Niki’s.
"I already quit."
Niki looks up, pulling off his dripping blood red Brabham racing helmet, peeling up the cream face mask to look at the taller man, standing under the cover of the pits, head low, shoulders hunched, hands stuffed deep into his pockets. The Austrian pauses, his drenched suit pooling rainwater beneath his boots, running a small hand through his tuffs of puffy brown curls, along the region of rippled scar tissue and the crinkled skin graft. He reaches over, with his left hand, seeing his fiery gold band, to the wooden table by the exit, tucking his Goodyear cap over the majority of the scarring, as behind him, in the dripping, misting rain, Nelson Piquet roars by on the track, a shower of spray following the Brazilian’s Brabham.
"Niki." James’ voice is low, soft, open with rawness, rare vulnerability. Niki blinks, looking up from beneath his cap, up at the tall blonde, who gazes at him, eyes lost.
"I am flawed." Niki murmurs then, into the silence, the veil of quiet, as the world around them is wet and dripping and soaked with water, flooding the grass. "I am harsh. I am frank, reserved." He looks up then, at the Brit, his husband, watching James’ eyes cast downward, the hurt moving in the air between them. "You knew all of this."
"Yes." James whispers, like a prayer.
"You knew why I raced, what my position was." The smaller man blinks, swallowing, looking down, too frightened to see James’ reaction to his next question. "Why did you marry me?"
The question is agonizingly painful, in that it is simple, quiet, soft, and rips through one like a thin blade, unseen, unfelt, until it has already torn your heart apart. And James’ gaze leaps up, his eyes swimming with the shine of tears not yet cried, his eyes raw and open to show Niki the bleeding underneath.
"I did it," James whisper then, like he is ashamed. "because I though we needed it. I though it would settle us. I thought it would make us….real."
Real. Because Niki had never asked out James, and James had never asked out Niki, and neither had come out as gay, and neither had told their families or friends, and neither knew what it meant to truly be with someone, without marriage. He needed something- wedding rings, a piece of paper, a ceremony- that would tie them together, prove that they were real, that they were something, so that he could stop fearing that this all meant nothing.
That they had never been anything at all.
'Why did you say yes?” James asks, his voice so raw and agonizing, that it rips through Niki, that it forces his head down, as he struggles to find the words James needs to hear. But that's not what the man he is asking. He wants honesty this time. Brutal, devastating, honesty.
"I said yes to you, because I thought that it seemed like the next thing people do." The brunette murmurs, hating himself with each word, looking up, straightening. People meet, they date, they get engaged, they get married, they have kids, they die. It was the next step. It was logical. The actual sentiment…it meant nothing to him. He was with James, it was simple really, only society and life made it hard.
"Niki, everything I said to you, about why I wanted to be with you, it was true." James says, his voice low, more sure of himself. "I want to kiss you all the time, I want to fall asleep with you every night. I wanted to race alongside you, stand beside you at the podiums, walk with you through the pits. I wanted you at my side through all of it. I just lost my way."
"You did what you needed to do. You won." Niki says, and James tilts his head, as though Niki hasn’t heard him.
"I should be racing with you, I know I should. I am sorry that I’m not. I know you want me, I know you wish I was."
Niki nods then, wordlessly, knowing that James knows him well enough to know all this without asking. He wishes James had not retired. With all his will, he misses chasing him.
"Do you love me, Niki?" James asks then, and Niki swallows, looking away. He sees the large, fat, black, rubber tires in the corner, staring until they become blurred with his poor vision, and the tears he cannot cry.
"My family hates me." The Austrian says, his voice low, quiet. "I was ridiculed for racing, I was cast out. We never showed affection- family was business. My family was made of hatred, and words unsaid. So James, I don’t know what being in love is."
The words tear at James’ heart like claws, boring him open, leaving him raw and gaping and devastated, staring at the man he married with his mouth opening in pain, in silent sobs, the devastation rolling off of him in waves, as Niki eyes crumple, as he despises himself for hurting James, and looks up, gathering himself.
"That said, I love the way you smile, I love the way you laugh. I love your features, your body, the sex. I love watching you race, I love watching you dance. I love how confident and loud you can be, and how sensitive and quiet. I love all of this, James."
James looks up then, his eyes a question, and Niki relents.
"I am different from you, I speak so many languages, I like flying, I like business, I am determined and precise and obsessive. And you are English, you have family, you like birds and partying and drinking and smoking weed. And I almost died, and I will not loose. I am me, and you are you. I love you, I know I do. But I love you, James, in a way that will never work."
There are tears now, streaming down the British man’s cheeks, dripping off his jaw, as the Austrian swallows, feeling his body tremble silently, as both men are crying. Niki feels his heart tearing apart, cracking and ripping, his voice desperate, brutally true.
"If I was going to love anyone, James," the driver says, his voice wavering, thick with tears, "be with anyone, marry anyone, it was going to be you. There is no else, James. It was you."
And James knew what Niki meant then. James was Niki’s, but he had loved James as much he could have. He was not capable of anything more.
With the signing of this document…
James grasps the lid of the handle, pouring a drink, watching the brown liquid splash into the clear glass.
…the dissolvement of the union between James Simon Wallis Hunt, and Andreas Nicolas Lauda….
James swallows, staring down at the simple note, left behind, with all the words unwritten, that James knows he would have said.
i wish i could post the new fic but i can’t so here’s a snippet
“See?” James brings the picture closer to his son, smiling down at Kimi, “There’s me, and there’s mum.” Kimi reaches up and grabs the picture from James’ hand, instantly bringing it to his mouth to suck on.
“Hey,” a chuckle leaves the blond, and he saves the photo from a drooly death, but Kimi fusses with a little bit of whining. “None of that, you’ll probably want this when you’re older.” He scolds softly, placing a kiss to his son’s forehead gently. He places the picture aside and turns to face Kimi, who’s rolled to the other side of the bed. He stops once he hits the pillow, and then looks up, blinking his icy grey eyes as he stares at James.
“Come, baby,” James mutters, patting the space in front of him, and Kimi eyes it for a second before looking at his father’s face again. He doesn’t move. James sighs and smiles, grabbing a nearby pillow and placing it under his head, “Come nap, Kimy. Come nap with me.”
Kimi yells at him and it ends with a gurgle, and James smirks. He loves ‘talking’ with Kimi, so he asks, “Why not?”
The little boy gurgles and rubs his face into the soft blanket beneath him, and James chuckles.
“What was that?”
Kimi gurgles again, lifting his head and looking at James with furrowed brows.
“Oh, you look just like that rat, Niki, love,” James chuckles again, finally sitting up and crawling over to his son, picking him up easily and cuddling him as Kimi squirms against his bare chest.
OKAY SO this is based on two things: one’s that I have only ever been to Butlins on family holidays but literally loved it, and the other involves my boyfriend’s brother, who apparently used to get his parents to buy him balloons and then deliberately let go of them as soon as they were outside
whenever i see these post-apocalyptic films set in the USA where everyone is pretty much just killing each other with no mention of other nations i always just assume that the rest of the world is fine and has learnt how to resume life as normal
To Kimi it was nothing more than another day that warranted money spent on absolute junk, there was nothing special about chocolate and he hated even catching sight of the sickly sweet brown stuff.
Unfortunately Seb demanded they parade through town together a couple of days prior, and possibly every shop that caught his eye was decked out in pinks and reds, he would have left a long time ago had Seb not insisted on perusing the selections of chocolates.
Did he really find this crap appealing? It seemed like he was hinting so as he kept nudging Kimi and pointing at chocolate teddy bears with a grin on his face.
As the shops began coming to a close, Sebastian rewarded Kimi with an ice cream as they sat on the pier together, watching the tide pull in.
"So, what do you want for Valentine’s?" Seb questioned, eyeing the Finn as he licked the ice cream somewhat seductively, uncertain if it was purposeful or not.
The question took him by surprise for some reason, he stopped and stared for a moment incredulously.
"Not chocolate." He replied bluntly, and instantly wanted to take it back as he saw the flash of disappointment on Seb’s face. The two remained in an awkward silence as the sky began to darken.
The morning of Valentine’s came and Kimi opened his eyes to a row of chocolate Moomins arranged carefully at the bottom of the bed, he blinked the sleep out of his eyes before sitting up and picking up the chocolates, smiling slightly. He was completely unaware of Seb’s presence in the doorway, and his head shot up as he heard the door creak.
He dropped the Moomin immediately as if caught in a criminal act and glared at the camera Seb held in his hands. The German stifled a childish laugh and stopped recording, fleeing from the doorway when he realised he was in trouble, and just as well Kimi had thrown off the quilts and chased him down the stairs.
The playful mood ended abruptly as they ended up leaning against one another on the sofa, Kimi acted like he wanted the chocolate and instead fed as much as possible of it as he could to Sebastian as he was distracted with the TV’s nonsense.
The whole Moomin family had been devoured as Sebastian realised he had one other present, but it was no use trying to get it for the moment as he was latched onto tightly by his companion.
"Don’t you want to see your other gift?" He chided, raising his eyebrows in encouragement. Kimi remained silent and loosened his grip as if giving permission. It didn’t take long for Seb to retrieve the gift and return, he pushed it into Kimi’s hands and stared in anticipation.
He didn’t have much appreciation for trinkets usually, but even this box was intricately designed and it seemed a shame to open it. Regardless he did after taking in all the details and fished out the bracelet that sparkled inside.
"Jewellery?" He asked, nonplussed. Seb replied with a huge grin, unphased by the lack of enthusiasm.
"Read it!" He ordered, bouncing on the seat in slight glee. The Finn obeyed and ran his eyes over the bracelet, there was some kind of inscription in German and a date, he shot Seb a quizzical look.
"Oh, that must be mine. Yours is in Finnish, but it says the date we first met and ‘Together forever’ on it!" He explained. Kimi smiled and helped Seb to put his bracelet on, he’d find his later, but right now he was more concerned with something else.
With a small gesture he brushed a lock of hair aside and pulled Seb in for a deep and long kiss, leaving them both gasping for breath and hungry for more. Kimi grinned as he stared into Seb’s eyes.
"I.." He paused and pressed a kiss to Sebastian’s neck.
"Have" He added, easing off Seb’s shirt.
"Something" His trail of kisses commenced down his stomach.
"For you.. too" He breathed, stopping at the bottom and making short work of unbuckling Seb’s trousers.